Hello

Hello everyone.

When I found this forum (around march or april), I wasn´t even sure about being Shadow. I certainly didn’t feel like one of those typical fluffy angels that I found up ‘till now. As I read through posts here, I came to know that fluffy angels are just a myth and some memories began to come.

I started with my wings, they were something I couldn’t possibly discard as my imagination. As I searched through kin types, I once again came back to the idea of being an angel. This time I fortunately found this forum. Later more pieces resurfaced but it’s still mostly feelings and rarely anything else. One of the things I remembered is how I used to look. Male body, dark blue wings, eyes of very similar color as wings and straight black hair. About name and who I am… I think I might be Azra’el but I’m still not 100% sure.

I hope to find here more about myself, my past and change, that I feel coming.

Nazra

Welcome to the forum
My name is Capsha, but call me Cap, I'm obviously an angel. As an angel you can call me Haniel/Hanael/Haneru/Hani'el, whatever works! I'm also the host of this body and the one who you'll see around most often, though Fibreya and Cherry are usually not far behind me.

Don't be disheartened if you come across others who claim to be Azrael, many angelkin find people who are, essentially, them. No one is really right or wrong in that situation. Sometimes it can be awkward but I think it's best to embrace it and learn from them, so don't freak out or think this isn't me then just because someone else thinks they might be you. In saying that, I've never come across another Haniel...

Enjoy your stay here!

~Capsha

Since I was mentioned I figured I might pop in to say hello. I'm Fibreya and I'm a Nephilim though I prefer the terms Daeva or half-angel. My father was angelic.

~Fibreya

AZRA'EL?!

*spits out massive amounts of coffee*

... Holy shit, I REALLY hope you're him! Dx

Azra'el served under me as an angel of death long ago... He was... both my comrade, and a good friend of mine; VERY good friend. I trusted him and Lururiel more than any other angel of death or angel in general...

Also, if you really ARE Azra'el, there's someone else here who would be ABSOLUTELY ECSTATIC to see you, I'm sure. ^O^

... Sorry. Didn't introduce myself... Got REALLY excited... ^^"

I'm Melari, this planet's Deathkeeper. Specifically, the Keeper of Death, Destruction, and Love. I'm a being known as a Keeper of the Multiversal Balance, or Keeper, for short. Some of my true form's physical features are animalistic in nature (mine are those of a cat/Edenic liger/ligeress), and I would normally have a few animalistic behaviors (I currently have one or two), thus I am a Feral Keeper.

I-I'm j-just in SHOCK! To think we might FINALLY have found Azra'el...

By the way, would my name or any of what I mentioned happen to ring any bells?

In... any case, welcome to the forum! Enjoy your stay here; everyone here is very kind, accepting, and helpful, at least from my experience. =)

~Melari

Thanks for the welcome Cap, Melari.

At first I really hesistated if I should reveal my thoughts about who I might be. But I finally got myself to join this forum so I was like "I can very well go out with a flash!". Not really flashy but I'm usually very careful of what I say.

For now I don't have much to support my identity since I myself am not sure about it. I cannot even really explain why I think I am Azra'el... But unless someone remembers blue winged Shadow that will feel closer, I will stick to that.

Sorry Melari, I don't remember you yet but somewhere you wrote something about wardance. THAT I remember. Somehow I had a memory of that for quite some time but just didn't connect it with anything. So when I read your post my jaw literally dropped to ground.

Nazra

*spits out even more coffee*

O3o Whoa...

Even if my name doesn't ring a bell (yet, if it even will; I'm hoping it will) , if you remember Wardancing, then there's DEFINITELY a chance that you're him! *excited squeal* =D

~Melari

Welcome to the forum, Nazra! I hope you find this a safe place where you can share your thoughts and experiences. If you need anything you can contact me or any of the other moderators or admins.

Greeting and Welcome to the forum Nazra,

I hope you enjoy your time here as part of our on-line community and in our virtual home. As you read through the threads and posts you will see that all of us here have faced the ups and downs of Awakening and the slow remembrance of who and what we are. It's always important to remember that no one can tell you who you are and who you are not, only that will come in time and memory, and that can be a slow and gradual learning and understanding.

If you have any problems here in the forum please feel free to give a shout out to any of the Staff members and we'll do our best to resolve the issue as quickly as possible.

You will have seen that there is a 'members' section........ this is only visible to registered members so this is the place to post anything that is more personal and private to you and you only wish members to see.

Welcome!

Az

Welcome Nazra! i hope you enjoy your time here on the forum, and find who you are/were with relative ease. i know once i started connecting with these guys here, everything else just sort of clicked into place!

Hello Nazra and welcome I am Gabri'el and I knew Azra'el very well, and as Az and Ari'el said if there is anything you need don't hesitate to ask, we aren't here to judge but to help you in any way we can.

Hope you find the answers you seek

Welcome to the forum Nazra

I'm happy to add my welcome to those that have been given. You may have noticed that I've posted about a past shared with Azra'el quite a lot this year, and more that I have been searching for him. As with all those that we hold dear, sometimes we can be slow to accept or to trust that those wearing their names are who they say they are, at least for our own memories. So while I offer my welcome, I hope to get to know and understand you better and where you are coming from in the days ahead.

Ash

Thanks for the welcome everyone.

Of course Ashtart, I don't expect immediate acceptance from anyone. And well... in fact I don't even really know myself so at the moment I'm just kind of collecting any memories with hope of getting my own memory to work.

Nazra

Uuuuuhhh....aaahh...eeehhh.... Wwwwhhhh.... Zzzzzzhhhh....
Breatheeee!
Wowzerz. Ok.
Trying to come out of some sort of a bodily memory attack triggered by you and Melaris correspondence.... And AND AND your avatar picture!?? Strange, it triggered so much in me like i almost could not look at it and then got curious and kept looking at it and stuff was stirring kinda... Shaking, cramping of my hands and weird hand movements.... Still trying to cramp in a specific position...heavy breathing, facial expressions. ...Like Big eyes and mouth, tightening and squeezing of my hands and face soo strong.. More heavy shaking of hands... Dont get pictures so don't see whats going on... Just feeling emotions and my body...
Anyhoooo .....sorry...now to you.
Welcome! I am from Estonia, been to your country just driving through. I am also just beginning to remember. If u have read, I am connected to Melari and possibly to you! I seem to have been Lururiel! Also waiting for my own clearer memories to sink in about it to confirm it more to me.
Hope to connect with you soon!

Ooo, u did not get chocolate yet... Here u go

@Madhavi

... I wonder what it could mean...

~Melari

Umm .. Yea. Suspence again!
Hey Melari, do u remember wether i had too weapons, one for each hand?

To my recollection, you had three weapons: a short-bladed dagger, a one-handed double-edged sword, and your drum. I recall the blades being used quite rarely, but the drum was played with both hands. The drum was also used to perform attacks that used sound itself as a weapon.

~Melari

Awesome Melari, thanx... U must have trained me well, sounds mystical.
So curious about any details.

Mmmmmm... chocolate, it came just at the right time.

It's interesting that you remembered who you were now. Though I have no idea if it means something special. Or more like WHAT it could mean.

As with my memories... I am more or less still in the dark. I feel changes within myself but unfortunately that doesn't seem to affect my memory. So when it comes to you... just some vague sense of your presence and a bit of irritation. I think I didn't take well outbursts of energy that you produced by your behaviour. I was like old man and you were lively and young and too loud for me at the time.
Some changes in me are good... at least I'm no longer like old man.

Hei hei, excited to hear from you!
Interesting..... Yea... U lucky u remember what u looked like cause i dont yet, hard time with visual memories, getting feelings, emotions and stuff like that. I am so happy tho to have Melari here to help us remember...such a great help....
Love you Melari! And my heart misses you!
Im so happy you are here as well Nazra , feel like u are somewhere deep in my heart...

Hei hei, excited to hear from you!
Interesting..... Yea... U lucky u remember what u looked like cause i dont yet, hard time with visual memories, getting feelings, emotions and stuff like that. I am so happy tho to have Melari here to help us remember...such a great help....
Love you Melari! And my heart misses you!
Im so happy you are here as well Nazra , feel like u are somewhere deep in my heart...

Oooooohh my Gosh!! Cant wait to meet you all!!!!!!
Everyone please come to Hawaii!!!!!
But im serious!

Hahahahhahahhaha!!! I think its so funny u feel bugged by me!!! Awesome! R u still a male in this life?
(And sorry for all the posting... Just excited)

Nazra wrote:

Mmmmmm... chocolate, it came just at the right time.

It's interesting that you remembered who you were now. Though I have no idea if it means something special. Or more like WHAT it could mean.

As with my memories... I am more or less still in the dark. I feel changes within myself but unfortunately that doesn't seem to affect my memory. So when it comes to you... just some vague sense of your presence and a bit of irritation. I think I didn't take well outbursts of energy that you produced by your behaviour. I was like old man and you were lively and young and too loud for me at the time.
Some changes in me are good... at least I'm no longer like old man.

Sounds about right! I remember you having this, "Do I HAVE to work with her...?" kind of attitude towards Lururiel--especially at first--and yeah, she used to bug you sometimes, but I personally think it was pretty clear that you two had a lot of trust in each other regardless. You two were like those kinds of friends who act like they can't stand each other or annoy each other constantly, but you were still just that: friends.

You REALLY were such an old man though back in the day! You were always so serious... .3.

Even when you were joking around, they were more like these gentle, soft-hearted teasing moments as opposed to genuine fooling around. You were such a mature guy and you expected the same from those around you. I remember you only tolerating even some fooling around from those you had a close connection with. Glad to hear you've lightened up some though! xD

@Madhavi

Love you too, Lururiel! I'll be so happy when I finally get to reunite with my loved ones from long ago... My heart is still with you all and misses you all! <3

~Melari

You will remember more with time Madhavi.

And this time around I am female.

Quote :

Even when you were joking around, they were more like these gentle, soft-hearted teasing moments as opposed to genuine fooling around. You were such a mature guy and you expected the same from those around you. I remember you only tolerating even some fooling around from those you had a close connection with. Glad to hear you've lightened up some though! xD

That didn't change at all. Altrough I learned to be more sociable in this life. Besides... behaving like old man in this body and society would be a bit odd and hard, so I just adapted you could say.

I'm really happy for the three of you. I know how wonderful and joyous it can be to once again meet long lost friends. <3