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 A name I'm not sure of...yet

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Lili'el

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PostSubject: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Wed Dec 11, 2013 9:51 pm

It's a name (rather "names) that has been bothering for a while. I'm not sure who or what this means to me, but every time I find myself just..."daydreaming" (though it feels more like I'm thinking about, well, nothing) this is the name that pops up:

Leliel.

There's not much on this name except Leliel was the fallen angel of night and dreams, cast out around the same time that Lucifer was. No one even knows if Leliel is male or female. But I can't deny the strong connection and pull to that name. I don't know if this is my name or if it belong to another. Here enters the other name:

Lailah (I think it's pronounced lay-lah). I've read it's a feminine name with feminine characteristics Question,  but another source say both names belongs to a male angel. There's also a psychopomp aspect, Lailah was said to lead souls into the afterlife. I haven't mentioned it here but at one point many of my dreams involved me in some sort of ritual dress leading people to these tall black gates that had lush fruit, clear beach, and a sweet scene in the air on the other side. They happened for almost a week.

But combined with the association with Night, Dreams, and Death not to mention that strong jerking pull... I wouldn't be surprised if there was a connection of some sort with me and Leliel/Lailah. In fact I was incredibly nervous to post this. I figured that one person can only do so much without a second opinion or voice in this. If this name triggers any memory, feeling, emotion with you guys I ask if you could share that here. I really want to know now, because it feels like this is one of many things I've been running away from. Sorry for the sombre 'tude  Sad 

- Saea
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Wed Dec 11, 2013 10:06 pm

I must say, it does have a familiar feeling to it. Do you have any memories of Leilel him/herself? This might stir up some memories in others, if not, I'm sure others may get memories of this person. I'll meditate on the name to see if anything comes up.  Basketball 
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Ari'el
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Wed Dec 11, 2013 11:25 pm

I think it's interesting that Leliel and Lucifer were cast out around the same time. Lucifer is all about light and shining, where apparently Leliel is about darkness and night. Equal opposites that form a balance. Beyond that I don't have any other feelings or memories at the moment.

I tried looking up Leliel but i just got sent to the Wikipedia page for Lailah. It seems Lailah was involved in the entire journey of the soul, from conception to death. There is also something about helping Abraham. And there's something about male and female aspects. Here's the link if you haven't seen it yet. http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lailah
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FeirceDeity64

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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Thu Dec 12, 2013 8:51 pm

Ari'el wrote:
I think it's interesting that Leliel and Lucifer were cast out around the same time. Lucifer is all about light and shining, where apparently Leliel is about darkness and night. Equal opposites that form a balance. Beyond that I don't have any other feelings or memories at the moment.

I tried looking up Leliel but i just got sent to the Wikipedia page for Lailah. It seems Lailah was involved in the entire journey of the soul, from conception to death. There is also something about helping Abraham. And there's something about male and female aspects. Here's the link if you haven't seen it yet. http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lailah

Interesting! Perhaps memories will assist us in learning more about Leliel!  Very Happy 
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Lili'el

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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Sat Dec 14, 2013 1:27 am

I hope so Smile Sometimes, I always thought of Leliel as the "fallen angel version of Morpheus", a deity I a have close relationship and connection with. So, I doubt this is a coincidence... much more like synchronicity.

A balance. That's something to think about. I wonder if they (Lucifer and Leliel) knew about each other.
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Sat Dec 14, 2013 1:42 am

Saea wrote:
I hope so :)Sometimes, I always thought of Leliel as the "fallen angel version of Morpheus", a deity I a have close relationship and connection with. So, I doubt this is a coincidence... much more like synchronicity.

A balance. That's something to think about. I wonder if they (Lucifer and Leliel) knew about each other.

Yay for synchronicity! Smile

I have a feeling they did know about each other.
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Ishtahar
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Sat Dec 14, 2013 8:26 pm

I have the strangest feeling about those names. I don't know why. It feels to me - maybe a memory, maybe just a feeling - that the two names belong to the same person but in a different capacity. I can't explain. I think the nearest I get is like when a magician (I mean someone who does ritual magik, not the kind who pulls rabbits out of hats) takes on a magical name for use in only in ritual, sabbats, circles etc.

I also have an image of someone in a blue robe, with a golden cup in their hand, kneeling in front of what seems to be an altar of some kind. Something that looks like black smoke, or shadow, is spilling over the altar and pooling around the knees of the kneeling person. There's no sense of threat though, or danger, but of deep peace and joy. Strange vision
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Mon Dec 16, 2013 11:24 pm

Ishtahar wrote:
I have the strangest feeling about those names. I don't know why. It feels to me - maybe a memory, maybe just a feeling - that the two names belong to the same person but in a different capacity. I can't explain. I think the nearest I get is like when a magician (I mean someone who does ritual magik, not the kind who pulls rabbits out of hats) takes on a magical name for use in only in ritual, sabbats, circles etc.

Maybe one of the names is the actual name while the other was the Eke Name (inner court name), like in modern Wicca. Another theory could be that Leliel/Lailah might chosen a different name after some huge event like the loss of a home or loved one, ascendency...or rather descendancy. It deepens the mystery even more  Cool 

Ishtahar wrote:
I also have an image of someone in a blue robe, with a golden cup in their hand, kneeling in front of what seems to be an altar of some kind. Something that looks like black smoke, or shadow, is spilling over the altar and pooling around the knees of the kneeling person. There's no sense of threat though, or danger, but of deep peace and joy. Strange vision

 Shocked I have the Vertigo Tarot deck by Neil Gaiman, Rachel Pollack and Dave McKean. One of the court cards has a description like that: the Queen of Cups. In the image you don't see an altar, but she is surrounded by shadowy waters. The cup does look golden, but the blue overtones make it look green. I have a strong connection with that card, and I think I did a post about talking it kept coming up in my Celtic Cross readings as the 10th card (outcomes/results).
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Wed Dec 18, 2013 7:59 pm

I haven't seen that pack.I googled it but Google Images doesn't seem to know much about it, especially the Queen of Cups Any chance you can take a photo and post it
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Lili'el

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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Wed Dec 18, 2013 9:41 pm



I'm so sorry it's a rather large image. I just couldn't resize it well enough. Either way I think Dave McKean did an amazing job with the overall dream-like images in this deck. Personally I like how the pearls look like full moons.
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Thu Dec 19, 2013 11:43 am

Wow. Just wow. I definitely didn't see that image when I searched google. It's amazing.
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Fri Dec 20, 2013 4:12 am

Isn't it? The image is captivating by it's self. She looks like she would be a magician (in fact that's what it says in the companion tarot book). I don't think it was chance that this was the image I got when you described you vision. I've been feeling an insane pull to this card for the longest time.
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Fri Dec 20, 2013 5:57 pm


The Queen of Cups is an interesting card. On the face of it, it's about femininity, matters of the heart etc etc. But that''s the whole point. Cups are all about water and, like an iceberg, the biggest part is under the surface. I love this card because of its sheer depth and the layers of meaning. It can change completely depending on the reading, the reader, the places of the other cards, and just mood.
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Sat Feb 01, 2014 7:59 pm

Still trying to find out more about Lailah/Leliel. A site (I forget which one) said that Leliel is close to the name Lilith and another spelling for Leliel is Liliel. I had a dream that I was called Liliel. And saying that name (Liliel/Lili'el)... it feels like a link to my chest is being pulled, as if it's saying "Come, come closer".
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Mon Feb 03, 2014 5:17 pm

Interesting. Follow the pull. Smile
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Wed Feb 19, 2014 1:51 am

At this point I think it's safe to safe that there's a strong possibility that I was/am Lili'el/Leili'el, though I still don't remember being Shadow at all. It's still very foggy. I'm starting to get the feeling that Lili'el was/is female. It's all lining up too flawlessly just to throw it aside and think nothing of it. But... there's still missing pieces. Memories are beginning to come back at last the more I meditate on the names. It fits too well, too perfectly. It's awesome but a bit scary.
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Wed Feb 19, 2014 12:02 pm

Saea wrote:
At this point I think it's safe to safe that there's a strong possibility that I was/am Lili'el/Leili'el, though I still don't remember being Shadow at all. It's still very foggy. I'm starting to get the feeling that Lili'el was/is female. It's all lining up too flawlessly just to throw it aside and think nothing of it. But... there's still missing pieces. Memories are beginning to come back at last the more I meditate on the names. It fits too well, too perfectly. It's awesome but a bit scary.

The only thing to fear, is fear itself. I say you embrace the memories of who you once were and learn from the experiences of this past life.  Smile 
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Sat Feb 22, 2014 6:10 pm

Moving forward is often scary, but the real development is in the journey. Facing your fears can only make you stronger in the end
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Sat Feb 22, 2014 7:38 pm

Ishtahar wrote:
Moving forward is often scary, but the real development is in the journey. Facing your fears can only make you stronger in the end

Indeed. Think of it as a child fearing the darkness. If the child chooses to never brave the dark, they will forever wonder what may lie within its depths. But if said child embraces it, they will discover nothing harmful was there the whole time and will never fear the darkness again.
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Thu May 01, 2014 9:22 pm

I believe I'm now comfortable saying that my name was/is Lili'el: in various memories I've had, too many people called me that. I think it's a beautiful name now that I think about it. But at the same time I feel like this name was given later on in my life, to hide something, or that I received another name to hide something. There's another name to Lili'el, much like the eke names and magician name Ishtahar and myself talked about earlier in the post. I feel that Lili'el is my name...but there was another that I truly feel was my true name.
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Fri May 02, 2014 11:51 pm

That's wonderful. It's a feeling much like coming home, I think when we own our name.

And yes, it is a beautiful name
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Sat Dec 06, 2014 5:52 am

Lately the name Lailah/Leilah is coming up again. I remembered that I had connected it to Lili'el/Lelie'el. I wonder why it's coming up again? I'm still trying to figure this out...better find more pieces to line up. When I still think of myself as Lilie'l, the name Lailah/Leilah isn't that far behind. Maybe I was called Lailah and Lili'el.

This sucks. I had it almost figured out, then I lost it. Curveballs *tch*.... However I want to mention the depiction Ishtahar said a few posts back still rings true. I almost remember it as an event to be honest.
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Sat Dec 06, 2014 6:37 pm

Perhaps it's a different aspect, something you put on in certain situations? Or perhaps it's a different life all together?
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Tue Dec 09, 2014 4:19 pm

Names change with time and even situation.

People have pet names, official names, shortened names, simplified names, translated names etc etc.

Maybe they are all versions of the same name?
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PostSubject: Re: A name I'm not sure of...yet   Mon Dec 15, 2014 9:39 pm

Ari'el wrote:
Perhaps it's a different aspect, something you put on in certain situations? Or perhaps it's a different life all together?


This does go back to the post about how Lailah had felt like an eke name or something and I have given thought to it possibly being another life as well. As for an aspect... I never thought of that actually.

Ishtahar wrote:
Names change with time and even situation.

People have pet names, official names, shortened names, simplified names, translated names etc etc.

Maybe they are all versions of the same name?

I like that theory as well. Maybe I'm blowing things out of proportion here?
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