ARCHIVE: Guardians? Or something else?, Thoughts would be welcome

By Shemyaza Jan 30 2009 -

Last night, and so far all this morning, I have this sensation of two guardians watching and following me, just behind me, it is so strong I can almost see them. I feel no malice from them, just warmth. One is male and the other is female, also at the same time my lower back, where a lot of my memories eminate from is killing me, almost as if it is being blocked.

The pain is kind of physical but not, it is hard to describe, a little bit like a damn has been built over the pipe from the universe, it makes little sense to me, does anyone have any ideas?

The closest I have come to this previously was a possession I had once, by a spirit getting out of Mary King's Close, in Edinburgh. I do not know if any of you have been there, or are from there, but it is that kind of opressive feeling on my back. I do not know if the guardians (for want of a better term) have any connection to that or not.

It is a little unnerving.


By Azaz'el Jan 30 2009 -

I think I have mentioned this in another post but the sensation at the small of the back and the solar plexus/sacral area can be attributed to the Hara.... the energy centre where the universal energy enters and leaves the body which is directly linked to past lives, past life memories and, if you believe in it, karma.

If there is any pain there it could be linked to memories trying to come through, or the ones that have come through need time to be assimilated and understood. The best way to deal with this can be to try and rest, not look for answers too hard but allow anything to come through gradually, and to cleanse your energy system.

At least this is one explanation.

Az


By Shemyaza Jan 30 2009 -

Thank you, I do remember your previous post, but the pain (for want of a better term) was new. I am aware that I am being impatient, it is like a hungry man being teased with a few crumbs when he wants the full feast, a full feast would be just as damaging, but it does not stop him from wanting.

A lesson I am learning, slowly, very slowly but getting there.


By Ishtahar Jan 30 2009 -

We've all had hard lessons to lear, often they are the most powerful and important in the long run.

If things are coming slowly it is because you need time to deal with them as they do... I can see that you understand this already but thought I would state the obvious just in case... it's this talent I have wink.gif


By Shemyaza Feb 3 2009 -

Sometimes the obvious is needed if only to ram the message home!

Sometimes what seems obvious to one, is not to the other....so once again, perhaps the obvious is needed.

Especially here, I find, that the obvious should always be stated, you never know what you might have missed, a little like finding something that was lost in plain sight.


By Ishtahar Feb 3 2009 -

Yeah, I've done that often enough.

I am the world's best at not seeing what is right in front of my face, just ask Az.

I think we are all a bit like that, it's a matter of degree.

The fact is life is hard. Not just in a physical sense. It is so difficult making sense even of the mundane things that happen every day, for those of us with a different dimesion to our lives sometimes it feels as though it would be easier just to let it all go and be 'normal', to forget the pain and the struggle and hide among the sheep.

The very fact that we are not doing that, that we are facing things and working with them no matter how hard it might be means that we are strong brave people and I have been and am greatly impressed by all of you.

I hope this year will bring us all hope, strength and a measure of peace.


By Shemyaza Feb 3 2009 -

Yep been there doing that......

during my childhood, I felt different, enjoyed the feeling without understanding. As I get older, I do not wish to be part of the flock, not by any sense or imagination, noooooooooo

But also, at the same time I understand the desire for a 'normal' life. Am I brave or just foolish? But I just can not seem to let go, it is the conflict of wanting to know, wanting to understand and the fear of what that will bring.

I am a massive Doctor Who fan, (I try not to grow up smile.gif) and there was an episode where the main character was left on the edge of a strange and seemingly endless pit and the desire we all have to jump in and the fear of what doing that might just bring. Yep, that scene sounded deep deep bells with me.


By Ishtahar Feb 3 2009 -

I never made it past 12. smile.gif

I love Dr Who too, and Torchwood (but that's just because I have the hots for Cpt Jack (and yes I KNOW John Barrowman is gay but that doesn't stop me looking and liking) )

The thing that really rung bells for me is this whole thing about the Doctor's home not existing any more. I have a real Welsh sense of Hiraeth for something that I know doesn't exist now.

Gods getting introspective again. Better stop now.


By Azaz'el Feb 3 2009 -

Just to get things straight, John Barrowman is mine.....all mine!!!

Don't get me started on Hiraeth otherwise I'll not stop and end up crying my eyes out!!

I know how it feels to stand on the edge of the pit and wish, with all of my lives, to jump in. It's strange, the last time I faced the dark pit.... and it was through water..... I had such a yearning to step in and fall, knowing it would, eventually, take me to the Source. I have the need to be exposed to the Source in all its burning fury and be cleansed of the constant need to return home.

Or just oblivion would do.

Az


By Shemyaza Feb 4 2009 -

Hey......lets all chill on the Capt Jack thing, I am sure he would not mind coping with all of us at the same time wink.gif

Just means that they might never be another series of Torchwood if we did LOL

And yes, the Gallifrey thing got to me too, but I have noticed that about alot of new series, especially the ones that have come back like Battlestar Galactica, there seems to be a resonance in the subconcious that is spilling through in the media.

Or is that just me?


By Ishtahar Feb 4 2009 -

You may very well have a point


By Sari'el Feb 4 2009 -

I am so glad somebody finally said that. Series like Moonlight or Supernatural...even Psych... It all comes down to this: the world is changing, people are scared and make up fictional stories and heroes because they don't know what's happening or who can save them in real life.


By Shemyaza Feb 5 2009 -

It is the same with the myths and legends, it is the only way that a mind can cope with larger events, they may be distorted, they may not be entirley accurate, but under all that smoke is the flame, the truth that we are all trying to reach, sometimes you have to choke on that smoke to get to the real value underneath.

The subconscious is a strange gift, but a wonderful gift if you give yourself over to it. It is all about learning which threads to pick up and follow.


By Ishtahar Feb 5 2009 -

Everyone knows the world is turning.... it's just that they don;t know what it is turning towards... they feel it and fear it but they don;t know what it is so they use the only imagery they are familiar with to try and explain it in a way that they can understand and cope with... as you have said flames through smoke are distorted and the smoke makes you feel safe but the flames will still burn you once the smoke blows away so the sooner we can see them for what we are the sooner we can prepared the fire extinguishers.

Keep blowing at that smoke guys