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Stariana

Stariana

Posts : 52
Join date : 2012-05-25
Age : 30
Location : Tennessee

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PostSubject: Relationships   Relationships EmptyThu Jun 14, 2012 10:16 am

I'm sure many others experience this kind of difficulty...

I simply don't understand why my relationships with other angels/kin haven't worked out. You'd think that two similar beings with so much in common would get on splendidly, but it's just not the case. Maybe the upheaval of slowly discovering your true self is too much for a relationship to handle when both parties are experiencing it simultaneously? That's the conclusion I've really come to.

My "first" love is an angel. He helped me discover so much about myself. I wouldn't be who I am without him. He's a wonderful, strong being - though now lost in humanity. Sadly, we are no longer on speaking terms. Even when our relationship ended, I never wanted to lose his friendship, nor his presence in my life. We remained friends for a good while afterwards, but soon had a big clash and have scarcely spoken since. That was 4 years ago.

The second...I don't know what he is. When fear and anger were predominant in my perception of him, I used to think him insane. Looking back with the knowledge I have now, I know he is something else. I don't think he's angelic...but something else, or a combination, that I can't really put my finger on. He, too, was a great man...but lost in humanity, lost in himself, lashing out towards me - when all I required of him were very simple, basic things. A complete failure as a father, he is.

The third...we were never officially an item, as you would say. We met at similar points in our life, shared ancient memories and experiences, but his life-situation separated us, and we never really had a chance to "be." We're still friends, still speak online from time to time. But I haven't seen him in nearly a year. And I will probably always wonder, "what if?" Even though I don't really believe us to be meant for a relationship....but maybe I just tell myself that so I can move on with my life, unhindered?

The man I'm about to marry is...quite young, speaking towards the age of his soul. I quite rather feel like a "cradle robber" of sorts. lol! I feel he has untapped potential, but that isn't my concern. He is loyal, perhaps to a fault. He is simple and uncomplicated. He communicates, mostly. He loves my daughter as his own. He requires some guidance and reminding of things, but he puts me first - and that is something I greatly need.

One thing I've found to be true in my relationships is that no sex with any human can compare to that of with someone you share a past with, who is like you at the core. Another thing I've discovered about myself is that if I am not kept "satisfied" in a relationship, I will instinctively seek out that satisfaction. As we all know, that's not something that is well thought of among humans. But, I feel that wherever I came from...it was normal. "Partners" or whatever it's called ALWAYS met the satisfaction of the other. And whenever there was refusal to, it was acceptable for the one denied to seek out their satisfaction with another, though still belonging to their partner...if that makes any sense. It's been difficult for me to adjust my way of thinking to how it is now. I even had this happen to me. The second man I spoke of did this to me...it's not that I was unwilling to satisfy (he turned me away most of the time), it was simply that I didn't have male genitalia. It seems he became "bi-curious" and sought out a man to have an affair with. After all of the turmoil and struggle and abuse he'd put me and our daughter through, I took it as my escape out and gladly took it. In my book, according to my old standards of my former home, I was free to leave. Though, I did have to fight for it. He traded his custody of my daughter for my car.


As I have rambled on greatly (and all the while grateful to be able to finally speak freely to someone), I am interested in the relationship experiences of other people here. I know there must be more who have met difficulty, not necessarily the oddities of my experiences. lol!
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Ishtahar
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Ishtahar

Posts : 1158
Join date : 2010-02-05
Age : 55
Location : Wales

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PostSubject: Re: Relationships   Relationships EmptyFri Jun 15, 2012 9:05 am

I could write novels... haha, I do but not on this.

Both of my relationships have failed because of what I am. I cant really say why. Maybe because they weren't who i was supposed to be with.

I can't imagine being with anyone but Sem anymore. Unless, of course Taz happens to be visiting Wales Smile
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Stariana

Stariana

Posts : 52
Join date : 2012-05-25
Age : 30
Location : Tennessee

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PostSubject: Re: Relationships   Relationships EmptyFri Jun 15, 2012 10:40 pm

With all of my relationships, I figure there must be something wrong with me. I have finally gotten to a point where I think I deserve a lot of good and happiness, but it just never seems to happen. I just feel like there's something wrong with me, or that I'm being punished for leaving my first love.
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Ousa

Ousa

Posts : 928
Join date : 2010-03-07
Age : 73
Location : Kansas

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PostSubject: Re: Relationships   Relationships EmptyFri Jun 15, 2012 11:28 pm

Don't think so! I love you

Understand this it took me 62 years to find my true first love. Although I am married now and happily I might say, I still had feelings of love and true love's lost until I came to this forum and found that one spiritual being that had first started my love for all of mankind... long long ago!

And I will never regret it, ever! The rest is just that history and I wouldn't change a moment in time for feeling that way. Let people talk but my heart is ruled by spirit nothing more and nothing less as so should yours. We cannot control time but we must have faith in the meeting or meetings to come in this lifetime or others. Please, I hope you understand my point here? I love you

Never ever lose doubt and by no means said that it didn't suck when you are apart!

Ouza Like a Star @ heaven

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Ousa

Ousa

Posts : 928
Join date : 2010-03-07
Age : 73
Location : Kansas

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PostSubject: Re: Relationships   Relationships EmptyFri Jun 15, 2012 11:31 pm

Never ever lose doubt and by no means said that it didn't suck when you are apart!

should be...

Never ever lose your heart to doubt and by no means no one ever said that it didn't such when you are apart from one another!
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Ishtahar
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Ishtahar

Posts : 1158
Join date : 2010-02-05
Age : 55
Location : Wales

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PostSubject: Re: Relationships   Relationships EmptyFri Jun 15, 2012 11:34 pm

True Smile

I don't think it's a matter of being punished for having left our first true love. I think it's more that no other love we're offered could compare. So, we keep searching for that pure emotion and reject everything less. Maybe it's because we have a better idea of what love is supposed to be an less of a tolerance to accept less.
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Zionis

Zionis

Posts : 239
Join date : 2013-01-13
Age : 25
Location : Where my soul wishes to be

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PostSubject: Re: Relationships   Relationships EmptyMon May 06, 2013 4:21 pm

(this is old I know, but) I never really had a successful relationship with human or otherkin, it never felt complete. I never been in a relationship with an angel, but I do feel that before my fall I had fell for another, but only a feeling not much a memory. It feels as if that was who I am meant to be with, but impossible to recapture that.
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