HomeHome  SearchSearch  RegisterRegister  Log inLog in  

 

 Updates Spring

Go down 
AuthorMessage
Ashtart

Ashtart

Posts : 1373
Join date : 2010-02-06
Age : 37

Updates Spring  Empty
PostSubject: Updates Spring    Updates Spring  EmptyThu Apr 10, 2014 3:22 am

It's been a while since I've posted anything of substance.  Part of that has to do with all the traveling I've been doing and how little I've had the internet o_o.  Part of it also has to do with my focus on stepping my game up, not unrelated to my identity here.

So, what's happened with me:

  • I moved from Hawaii back to the mainland in August.  Why?  I'm not sure exactly.  It was a psychic thing... I was feeling lost at sea (lol) after graduating from college in May, and no direction for what to do next.  My plans in college had changed.  If I had stuck with them, I would know exactly what to do - apply to grad school for performing arts.  I decided to continue my dance education outside of college and get a degree in Women's Studies (Social Justice) instead.  But I hadn't made a plan for what to do after that.
 

I did a reading for myself and it said simply, "Remember what you said you were going to do after college before?" (move to Northern California to attend a performing arts school).  "Well, you should still move to that area.  Just maybe... slightly... south."  I moved to San Francisco exactly a month later, In mid-August.

  • I moved to San Francisco.  ...  A lot of awful things happened there!  It was all Good, ultimately, but god am I glad not to be there anymore.  First of all, the building I lived in was haunted.  Like, legit, intensely haunted.  See... it used to be a crackhouse.  And then our building owner took it back from the City and turned it into artist residences.  Seemed like a great idea.  Throw a couple of buckets of paint on the walls, put new carpet down, fix the toilets, it's like they never existed.  It's too bad they didn't consult an exorcist.  


I was pulled to that building by good spirits, and a lot of people like me were.  It was an intense environment!!!  You had people who worked with crystals and light and prayer like me, who were tuned into magik and nature.  I and some others led the rest in ritual and mediation designed to clear all of our energy and raise the vibration of the building and the surrounding area (the Tenderloin.  Google it.)  In the meantime, you have people who LOVE and CRAVE or are not able to BLOCK the awful energies in the building.  Those people made life hell for the rest of us!  

While I was in San Francisco I also had a throat infection that I needed outpatient surgery for (my first), and an abortion (my first).  I'm still bleeding after a month and a half.  Not good times!!  I slept with someone in the building who I thought was okay and turned out to be intensely abusive (where do I find these guys!).  He broke into my apartment one day and tried to rape me ("I was drunk").  Why did all these bad things happen in San Francisco?  

  • I moved back to where I started.  When you've had an abortion because you could not be a relationship with your abusive boyfriend, your roommates both move out in the same day (planned long in advance, but eerie all the same), and you can't find a job everything starts to look very bleak and you feel very dejected.  Simply put, I needed my mom.  LOL.  But that wasn't the whole of it... I know this is all part of the spirits' (fucked up) plan.  (hahaha)  Roll with it!  Bad things happen to push you to good things.  They showed me after one job rejection that I was being rejected from these jobs because they were not remotely related to what I was supposed to be doing.


What I am supposed to be doing is helping to protect the Earth.  Moving back to DC was part of that.  Just four days after I got their message, I left SF for DC and home.  Not Home, Hawaii is and will always be my Home.  It's where my soul is from.  I am from DC in this incarnation, and so it is home.  Almost as soon as I moved back, it seemed that everything was right back on track.  Whatever I'd done to jump the tracks (or maybe just my EXTREME RELUCTANCE to move back to my home city that had beat me up so much before...) I was back on them.  Synchronicities happened abundantly, lots of good luck, good vibes, gifts from people.  Life seems good again.  

One night, I was told by some spirits that they want me to create a "National Society of Shamanic Practitioners" to give those of us that listen to and speak to Earth spirits can have a National platform for lobbying and speaking on her behalf.  That will take a lot of work.  I need help.  

Another thing that happened was a trip to Richmond, VA.  I had a chance to offer to my former energy teacher some energetic shamanic healing.  It was a great opportunity to put the skills I've acquired in Hawaii to the test.  I passed.  Perhaps I'll keep offering shamanic healing.  Perhaps I'll have to focus on other things.  I went to a symposium in Richmond addressing the desecration of burial plots in which hundreds (thousands?) of enslaved African people were buried.  Ancestors' spirits have called out to me a lot as well.  We do ourselves disservice to build and develop on land in which people were entombed.  So they asked me (the spirits) to do ritual there, to honor them and keep them sacred.  Perhaps I will.  

It's all tied to together.  A lot of it goes directly back to Hawaii for me... "keep Hawaii sacred."  There's both a reluctance by mainlanders to understand and keep the sacred, in the form of Earth spirits, and in the form of ancestors.  It would be one thing if we kept that to ourselves (well, actually, it is a terrible thing), but it's being imposed in the islands as well, and that cannot be allowed to stand.  So, the Hawaiian people are fighting for Mauna Kea and for other sacred places and I've been brought here...

What has been going on in your own lives?  I know not everyone is as drawn by the spirits as I have become, and perhaps nothing so serious has happened (or has). I'd still like to hear from you Smile
Back to top Go down
Lili'el

Lili'el

Posts : 162
Join date : 2012-12-09
Age : 27
Location : Texas

Updates Spring  Empty
PostSubject: Re: Updates Spring    Updates Spring  EmptyThu Apr 10, 2014 10:04 pm

Oh my, everything for you sounded so turbulent! I hope everything gets much better and blessed be.

I feel like the direction that I always though was right isn't the direction I'm meant to go. And I'm stubborn as Hell, so you can imagine, lol! I've been trying to pay out of pocket for college since FASFA said my grade were too low to continue getting Financial Aid. I feel like I have to find a job before June starts otherwise I can't go back. But nothing seems to be clearing up yet. I made career plans and now I'm not so sure how everything is going to work out anymore. Get a job, go to college, transfer, become a cellist. Sometimes I wish all I could do is skip the first three and just become a cellist on my own without college. Music is what I feel pulled to, but the methods to get there... it's like Spirit is saying "nope, you're not going the right way". It's so confusing. Not mention that seeing the ex-friends from high school have much more success and happiness than me gets me down big time.

I feel like I'm just floating between clairity and fog, ethereal and corporeal: it's not a good feeling. But me being the optimist, I know I'm going through this for a reason and I have to go with the flux the Universe made for me...even if it makes me question my sanity  Shocked . I know what I want. But the messages regarding that and many, many other things that I'm getting are too foggy to make clear up, or so it seems.

Blech, I sound so dismal XD  lol! It will get better. I just need to chill out and think for a while.
Back to top Go down
FeirceDeity64

FeirceDeity64

Posts : 216
Join date : 2013-11-11
Age : 20
Location : USA

Updates Spring  Empty
PostSubject: Re: Updates Spring    Updates Spring  EmptyFri Apr 11, 2014 3:40 am

Wow, it sounds like you've been going through one Hell of a ride! I'm glad you've found peace from it all.  Very Happy 


I am going through those awkward teenage years. Dividing my time between music, cartoons, and girls ( Wink ). It has been hard to remain in touch with my spirituality. I have no intention on abandoning it (how could I ever?), but God is it hard to keep on advancing myself in this field. Alas, everything happens for a reason it would seem.

I'm dealing with stressors in my life that I'd assume most other teenagers face (if you wouldn't mind hearing my adolescent complaining  Basketball ). My tendency to be a smartass leaves me butting heads with one of my teachers. I'm trying to hold my tongue now, seeing as it's probably best to let stupid do what stupid does, but that probably won't last long.

I'm going to stop here due to how small my problems actually are  tongue 


Back to top Go down
Ousa

Ousa

Posts : 928
Join date : 2010-03-07
Age : 73
Location : Kansas

Updates Spring  Empty
PostSubject: Re: Updates Spring    Updates Spring  EmptySat Apr 12, 2014 9:38 pm

First of all... missed you very very much!  And as for you so I too feel the negative that it is with, I assume us all.  I'm at a point where there are just no words, no actions, no deeds that can even begin to heal whatever it is that is going on in and through this lifetime for me and us all.

I often asked myself, why even... though you desire it so much, does it do any good to know who or even care about what your soul once was so long ago.  You just might find out that you were in fact responsible for a hell of a lot of crap!

How can we save this world if in fact we can not save our own selfs.  I keep getting by spirit..."get your own shit together before you even begin thinking of going out and saving mankind when in effect they most certainly don't care less other than what is and pertains to there own personal why's and wherefores.

People want to know.. but they want it on their own terms thats why they tend to cling and then so quickly move away.  It has always been said that the grass is greener on the otherside, but I've come to the conclusion that the grass is greener only with a lot of shit and plenty of water and with a lot of weeding and tending over a long long period of time, in this case for me it is and always will be these life cycles her on earth.


Just wanted you all to know that I love and miss you all and pray for a better perspective for us all, not just a bandaid but a real live down to earth cure for all of the negative crotch itch!  

Ousa  Like a Star @ heaven
Back to top Go down
Razi'el
Moderator
Razi'el

Posts : 527
Join date : 2010-02-08
Age : 31
Location : Ontario, Canada

Updates Spring  Empty
PostSubject: Re: Updates Spring    Updates Spring  EmptyTue Apr 15, 2014 12:31 am

things have been relatively okay for me, but quiet spiritually. it may be just that i'm so focused on my material life right now that the rest of it is getting drowned out.

for the past five years, i've been living with my father. a whole bunch of things happened to get me to this point; suffice it to say i can't get to canada for a long while, as my husband's stepfather basically told him not to have me live with them again, or he'd be out on the street, since he still lives with his parents.

years and years ago, before i really had extended contact with my father, i'd promised to help him with his bills and live with him a while after i got out of high school. i followed through with that, and now i'm trying to help support him and his family, despite his actions leading to dozens of horrible financial situations for us. he's the kind of person who recieves a bill and ignores it, thinking it will eventually just go away.

so, amidst all this hopeless negativity, i started doing things for my own good, like beginning a workout regimen, volunteering for more hours at work, splurging on myself a little, and a bunch of other things... i've begun getting messages, kind of, telling me i should start taking care of myself.

also i've been caring for some local spirits; two dragons who have been with me for some time, and oddly enough, a manticore spirit (he's been particularly helpful by devouring negative emotional energy around here, rather than encouraging it).

beyond that, there's not much to say, other than those continued urges to travel to hawaii and look around for whatever reason.

you're basically caught up on me now XD
Back to top Go down
Ishtahar
Admin
Ishtahar

Posts : 1158
Join date : 2010-02-05
Age : 55
Location : Wales

Updates Spring  Empty
PostSubject: Re: Updates Spring    Updates Spring  EmptyFri Apr 18, 2014 11:00 pm

Oh wow, Ash, just wow. not much I can say to that.

I've been going through a very tough time myself. I don't know how much anyone knows, but last year my son, who is 13 became suicidal. Through his referral to the psychiatrist he was diagnosed as autistic. It's been hard coming to grips with his autism and what it actually means for him and for us.

He was also diagnosed with anxiety and depression and we've been going to quite intensive therapy.

In March, for the second time, the police knocked on my door as my son had again decided to take his life. Fortunately he didn't go through with it but we spent three days in hospital before they put him on medication,

He is getting better, but they are now exploring the possibility he may be suffering an early onset psychosis, as he hears voices and sees people no one else can see. It's very difficult for me to draw a line between a delusion and simply seeing something no one else sees. One is dangerous the other is natural. It's not easy to work with professionals on this as they don't see there is a difference.

It's been painful, tiny steps and right in the middle I've now lost my job.

Pretty stressful time for me too.

Fierce, don't step back just because you think your stresses are small in relation to others, because everything is relative. 

The rest of you seem to be in the same kind of limbo with nothing really resolving. It's a strange time.
Back to top Go down
Meti'ne

Meti'ne

Posts : 332
Join date : 2012-04-02
Age : 27
Location : NJ, USA

Updates Spring  Empty
PostSubject: Re: Updates Spring    Updates Spring  EmptySat Apr 19, 2014 2:01 am

Last few months?

Broke up with my now ex-boyfriend, got together with another guy who I'm apparently on-break with (even though we still do "things" every so often; through Skype) I'm pretty sure because he's having a hard time dealing with the fact that another man (*coughShuzaricough*) already has a claim on me and that I can't truly be his because of that (though I can understand that he's upset over that). He knows that I'm a goddess and such so...

Speaking of which, I've began getting a bit more open about who I really am. I've told a few people now, one of which is also Otherkin, and the other two being my bf and his best friend; all three received the information with surprising ease. So that's pretty good!

But on another note, I am NOTORIOUSLY bad at reading human social cues, and it's been causing me some problems + incredibly frustrating. But a friend is going to be trying to help me with that. So that's good...

And I'm failing a class. So there's that. But I'm at least working to fix that.

But overall, because of all of that + the typical arguments I have with my mom on occasion + the feeling of emptiness I feel a lot, it's been.... pretty good? But also pretty damn stressful.

Not quite as bad as some of you guys though! I mean, holy shit, Ash and Ish!! I hope your situations improve soon!!! O_O

And as a final note...... I find it pretty interesting that we're ALL going through some form of stressful time! O_o

At least those who have responded to the topic have. Pretty interesting coincedence... Seems a bit odd actually, to be perfectly honest.

~Meti'ne
Back to top Go down
FeirceDeity64

FeirceDeity64

Posts : 216
Join date : 2013-11-11
Age : 20
Location : USA

Updates Spring  Empty
PostSubject: Re: Updates Spring    Updates Spring  EmptySat Apr 19, 2014 4:45 am

Meti'ne wrote:
Last few months?

Broke up with my now ex-boyfriend, got together with another guy who I'm apparently on-break with (even though we still do "things" every so often; through Skype) I'm pretty sure because he's having a hard time dealing with the fact that another man (*coughShuzaricough*) already has a claim on me and that I can't truly be his because of that (though I can understand that he's upset over that). He knows that I'm a goddess and such so...

Speaking of which, I've began getting a bit more open about who I really am. I've told a few people now, one of which is also Otherkin, and the other two being my bf and his best friend; all three received the information with surprising ease. So that's pretty good!

But on another note, I am NOTORIOUSLY bad at reading human social cues, and it's been causing me some problems + incredibly frustrating. But a friend is going to be trying to help me with that. So that's good...

And I'm failing a class. So there's that. But I'm at least working to fix that.

But overall, because of all of that + the typical arguments I have with my mom on occasion + the feeling of emptiness I feel a lot, it's been.... pretty good? But also pretty damn stressful.

Not quite as bad as some of you guys though! I mean, holy shit, Ash and Ish!! I hope your situations improve soon!!! O_O

And as a final note...... I find it pretty interesting that we're ALL going through some form of stressful time! O_o

At least those who have responded to the topic have. Pretty interesting coincedence... Seems a bit odd actually, to be perfectly honest.

~Meti'ne

Hmm... Didn't really notice that until now. Interesting observation.
Back to top Go down
Ari'el
Moderator
Ari'el

Posts : 737
Join date : 2010-03-30
Age : 34
Location : Upstate New York, USA

Updates Spring  Empty
PostSubject: Re: Updates Spring    Updates Spring  EmptyFri Jun 20, 2014 5:54 pm

Wow Ash... I had no idea...
And Ish... Damn...
Big hugs to everyone. I sincerely hope things are getting better for you all. Actually, it's been a few months now. How are things with everyone?

So here's what's been going on for me. A year ago I began grad school for a masters in environmental science. I started working on a thesis project over the summer. In August my dad was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer. It came out of nowhere. I started classes full time, while also working 20 hrs a week at a part time job, and working many hours a week on the thesis project, and trying to visit my dad who lived 5 hours away as often as possible. And of course dealing with the emotions of it all. It was insanely stressful. And during that time we were in a dispute with our psychotic neighbor over a fence. In October, exactly two months after the diagnosis, my dad passed away.

I was done. So I went on a leave of absence. During that time I did a lot of nothing, and grieving, and contemplating what I really want to do with my life. I got a bit more serious about the Sanctuary idea but that has since dropped off. I imagine it will come back at some point...

I continued to work at my boring, part time, temporary contract, dead end job. Got in trouble for not caring, but that place is bullshit and obviously doesn't give a shit about it's temp employees, even though we make up over half of the workforce, and there had never been any sign of getting hired or more hours or anything, so why the fuck should I care? But, the job is flexible and was a good support while the stuff with my dad was going on, so I'm grateful for that. So, anyway, I've been working there, and after a while this feeling started to grate on me. What was I doing here? Where am I going? What am I doing with my life? Started to feel like I should look into going back to school.

I found a new thesis project because the old one didn't feel right anymore. And this project, unlike the other one, is giving me a stipend AND covering one year of tuition. So yay Smile. I've started working on this project two weeks ago. I work on it in the afternoons while going to the boring job in the morning. Once classes start in the fall I will be dropping the boring temp job so I can focus on classes and the project. Nothing else. I think it'll be good. But now my days are much busier than they have been in a while. Still getting used to it.

I was working on some art and writing projects, but now with the new schedule I hardly have time for that, which is a little frustrating. I'm going to have to make time and set it aside for myself and my projects.

At certain points over the spring we had a total of 5 other people living in our house, paying us rent. It was fun but also agitating and even draining at times. They've all cleared out now, except for my mom, who was kicked out of her apartment for stupid reasons and had some health issues that I had to take her to the emergency room for. She's been staying in my room. We're working on getting one of the other rooms painted so she can go there and I can have my room back. It's been months since I've been able to have quality alone time in my own space and it's wearing on me.

I've also been putting a lot of energy into my pets, lots of vet appointments because one of the dogs has heartworm. With taking care of the pets and my mom, I haven't done much for myself. I need to go to a dentist for a chipped tooth and I need to find a primary care doctor, and get some repairs done on my car, but I haven't had a chance yet. Oh, and crazy fence neighbor has popped her head up again, so we'll see where that goes. Hopefully she won't actually sue us like she has threatened to do.

Spiritually things have been very quiet for months. Although in the last few weeks Ari'el has been around a bit, which is unusual. He's typically very quiet or not really around. He's been telling me that I (we, he and I) need to focus on me.
Back to top Go down
http://draconic-fire.deviantart.com
Sponsored content




Updates Spring  Empty
PostSubject: Re: Updates Spring    Updates Spring  Empty

Back to top Go down
 
Updates Spring
Back to top 
Page 1 of 1

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
 :: Putting The Pieces Together :: Body & Soul-
Jump to: