ARCHIVE: Introduction of Naamah

By Naamah-Ninmah-Chawat Nov 29 2007 -

Hello everyone, my name is Naamah Lilith.

I started awakening as a fallen about a year and a half ago, after first I had dedicated my life and work to Lord Lucifer. It started with a rather traumatic experience with an angel trying to harm me, which made me fight for my life. After that dreams, visions and even physical signs of me being otherkin has manifested. Many of us have multiple names from past times and so on.

I have found some other fallen ones, sisters and brothers in countries like Romania, US, Canada and UK. It seems like many are awakening in these times and there are indications that we shall be united very soon, in all realms connected to earth. We share knowledge and memories (telepathy, sometimes even like cloning/replication) among us and that will give us strength to be united.

My twin sister is Astaroth-Kali and she is closest to me this moment both physicly and in spirit. For a time I was trying to hide and deny what/who I am and I was struggling with vampyric symtoms, but now things have calmed down and I am trying to balance it as much as I can. I have learned that it is easy to fall into either chaos or the order/light but the path I've chosen involves both.

My earthly father and mother does not recognize their daughter anymore, and it must have been difficult for them aswell. I could say that my soul "took over" or changed the human one (even the DNA through astral work and meditation) in a kind of possession but more permanent. Some may think it is not morally right, but as a human working with hell you assist fallen ones in different ways.

There are those that want to give their body for us to use and we both saw it as a honour. However I still can be in different realms or bodies if needed, we are limitless and many times immortal in our existance. A few years ago the human being I host met me and my husband in a dream and agreed on things. She wanted to leave from here so I think of it as helping her to do that. There is always free will and I would never have forced it unto anyone.

I have a youtube channel, where I have not directly said that I am otherkin but that is not the purpose of my work there. Please watch if you are interested but I ask of you to be discrete about things like this. It is also a matter of integrity and not all may understand who I am or where I come from.

https://www.youtube.com/profile?user=Nahema666

Warm regards to my fellow kin, may we share the love and knowledge that we deserve after being hunted and demonized for so long.


Naamah


By Azaz'el Nov 29 2007 -

Welcome Naamah,

thank you for taking the time to introduce yourself and for being so open with us. In many ways such openess is something that can be severely lacking in some forums, and this usually leads to suspicion and problems. Both ishtahar and I have tried to create a forum where any member can not only feel safe but also be as open as they want to about themselves and their life - without, of course, revealing too many personal details. So thank you for sharing your youtube page with us - we will all respect your wishes and be descrete.

As one of the Fallen I have to say that my links to and memories of the Morning Star are few, even though we did have a connection of sorts. His time was quite a while before my own, and whilst he took on that role, I and my fellow Grigori (or at least the ones I currently remember) were away still undergoing training. So my title as Fallen comes from the second fall.

I can understand, in my own way, the mixture of chaos and order that your path takes. I think that for many of us it can take this route whilst we undergo awakening and begin to link back to the path we originally walked. My own path began in darkness in this life, with a gradual awakening and the knowledge of multiple lives, names and memories. Even now there are times I am still haunted by the ignorance of my past and the lost chances to awaken and prevent such an endless cycle.

I hope you will find your time in this forum to be fruitful, enjoyable and that we can all learn from each other. What is important is to unite all Fallen, Shadow and Kin for what is to come. Any help, insight or understanding you can bring will help us all.

Azaz'el


By Naamah-Ninmah-Chawat Nov 29 2007 -

Thank you so much Azazel.

I am indeed tired of hiding, there is nothing to be ashamed of so why live in the shadows. Some are very comfortable with that though and it is not bad either. I have been urged by my higher self and others to take this action now, to let you know that I am here and always was by your side. Just like the morning star is, and the time of Osiris rising is coming closer.
Unite with your Father, get to know him again he will not let you down this time like he did not in the beginning. However there were hard times for all of us, a family torn in pieces and the darkness of forgetfulness always gives pain and sense of loss.

I have been accused of many things as well as many others from our realm, but the real crimes are made by those who pretend to love everyone and everything they have always had a hidden agenda and I have had enough with the lies and slander. It is said I am a patron of rape and murder, a whore and what not. Not only offensive but also very ignorant thing to do. However it is the morning star, that has done everything for mankind and his children that my heart bleeds for.

This is not about starting a cult or getting followers, take pride in what you can do in this unity while still walking your own path. There is no authority, but the one of love under will as Crowley stated. I ask not recognition of any kind. The female spirit must not be repressed though, and the sexual force of women is what will save the men from killing everything in their way. We have learned that there can not be only male or female but both to have balance in things.

It is important to take a look in the mirror and see what lies within.
As this seems to be obvious, it is not to everyone and this is what needs to be done here once again. To lead them to light under spiritual strength, for being close to your Father gives you his essence or love but NOT endless compassion. It is not acceptable to let them spread this disease of weakness and ignorance any longer. If not direct action, the energy that rise in you will still spread to those around. Be welcome to invoke him whenever you can, it will set you free and give you the wings back.

To love and be loved, ignites the fire of lust which gives us back the memories and strength.
I am also here to help you get back home when needed and remember that you have been there.

When they see this light of us, they will remember as well and maybe have some hope instead of fear and dispair. Collective thoughts when negative gives negative consequenses and so on. The way there is to recognize the dark sides of self and the more violent nature. When you have wrath or hate and hold it within it will destroy you, better to let it go but careful where you direct it.

Better late than never Azazel, I don't know your physical age but try and not brood on the past too much. Remember all that you are valuable and important, I need you to help us as well. I am one of the links and you will all be that in your turn, as you say to unite and fight back once and for all. Or just live as you please while the worlds come together and hold your soul intact not to forget what you now know.

Love and light in the power of the black flame,

Naamah


By Dreamsend Nov 30 2007 -

Very interesting happy.gif I checked out your YouTube page and that was very interesting as well. I agree with you on chaos/light and female sexuality. I think that the feminine actual self has been repressed - that "scary" side involving taking charge of sex, aggression and elemental magic...

I have been wondering recently on the take of "traditional good" vs "traditional evil," and who is really right or wrong. I don't have as much familiarity with Lucifer as you do, and I'm really curious about him, I think ^^. My personal take is that I think that the Morning Star may have been one of the "good guys," so to speak, whose legend was turned into something else by religion and historians over the years.


I've also been reading about Sumerian legend recently and the "Brotherhood of the Snake," which closely parallels the Eden story in the Bible... It's all very interesting.

Your account is quite fascinating and yes! Thanks for being open


-- Dream's End


By Ishtahar Nov 30 2007 -

WOW I go away for a few days and when I come back there is so much here I can barely take it in. Maybe I should go away more often.

Welcome Naamah.

it will take time to process all you have said and I will get back to you properly at some point, although I will sleep in between so dont hold your breath too much.

I know very little of The Morningstar. In one way his time was before ours, as Az said but I see echoes of him in my Shem and I have had contact in the times since although not on a personal basis.

He fascinates me. I cannot say, hand on heart that I believe that he was one of the 'good guys' because I can say, hand on heart, that I have no idea who the 'good guys' were, are or will be.

I think it has gone beyond making those kinds of judgements. I know that the Ishtahar who loved Shemyaza was a spoiled and spiteful cow most of the time, at least in the beginning.

I believe that she has grown up and I hope I will do better this time.

We all had our faults but at the end of the day we all did what we thought was right at the time and I believe that the same was true for Lucifer. Who knows, if he had toed the line a little longer and been around in our day things might have turned out differently as I think he would have been a better leader than Shem.....well maybe...or maybe not,,,,,ah who knows. It is all in the past anyway, there is little point in looking back, other than to identify our mistakes in order that we can entirely fail to make them again.


By Naamah-Ninmah-Chawat Nov 30 2007 -

He will come back and I can't wait. Thanks a lot for your reply, I am trying to process all this as well. I have wondered why here, why now I have this kind of connection with him, why me.... But I feel I will go mad if I push it any further so I just accept that I am here and that he is close.

/Naamah


By Azaz'el Nov 30 2007 -

Dreamsend, perhaps you could start a new thread about the Brotherhood of the Snake, as I know there is a connection with it to Enki (Ea) and Enlil and the ascension of humanity.

Sounds familiar! wink.gif

Az


By Ishtahar Dec 1 2007 -

I know that feeling to Namaah, I have often thought that I would go mad and who knows maybe I have. biggrin.gif

I do know that if I am mad I can never go back to being sane it would be like locking me away in a small dark box after all I have seen and experienced in my current mad state biggrin.gif biggrin.gif


By Naamah-Ninmah-Chawat Dec 1 2007 -

When opening these doors there is really no way to close them, that I know of. So just go with the flow and have trust in yourself and the ones you love. That's my philosophy about this "madness", lol.

Hugs to you all

Naamah


By Araqiel Jan 28 2008 -

Naamah haven't we met somewhere or somewhen? Cloves and blood?

Well maybe not or the higher self has not yet overtaken or correclty incorporated and the human part is yet not able to leave. Something went wrong when the human was born. Something still blocks this road with zeal that comes close to a pack of wolfs being cornered and fighting for their lives.

Fate has been put to a screeching halt by forces hiding themself, perhaps by the combined human concious fear of the unknown itself.

Yet eventually just by the overprotective love of a mother that knows that she would lose her human son. I don't know and for the moment I can't tell maybe ask spirits.
Eventually someone can find out. Yet maybe this is just one of those nightmares without an end.

Cloves and blood.


By Ishtahar Feb 2 2008 -

Maybe it is but if so it is a nightmare we are all sharing.

I have been aware for some time that something is holding me back and I think it might be me. I know that doesnt make sense but I know I can do things I cant do and I know that I know things I dont know. When I question this I am told that it is because that when I fully become I will be a beacon and I am not yet ready to cope with what that beacon would attract. And so I am living inside a bubble, or under a bell jar or something and I have no idea if I am being limited by outside influences or by my own knowledge that now is not the time.

And I think that this is because there ARE people out there who are interfering with fate and with human development and our awakening.

WOW I sound like a conspiracy theorist. It is not that I am paranoid it is just that they are all out to get me rolleyes.gif


By Azaz'el Feb 3 2008 -

Well I think we're all pretty sure that the Shadow who have remained pretty much as they are with full memory have not wanted this time to come. The Great Cycle is their worst moment as it means that regardless of what they may do, we will all be released from our bonds and prisons and will be reborn. So as they can't stop that now, the best they can do is put as many obstacles and difficulties on our way as they can.

Most of us Shadow will act as a bright light in the world when we awaken, our energies will spread out and all Shadow will know when each soul returns. You, however, Ishtahar, are a somewhat different matter. Because of what happened between you and Sem, you will act like a beacon. It's no surprise your light needs to be kept hidden for a little while longer.

Az


By Araqiel Feb 6 2008 -

Dunno but for one:

I think we will need the two brawly brothers Michael the Archangel of Upholding the Teaching and of Dogma and Samael the fallen Archangel and first Satan of Upholding the Search for Truth and of Scepticism to make peace with each other at last.
Both are students of Lucifer.

Additional Belial brother of Lucifer and I think fallen Archangel of Knowledge will be needed also to return for the time being.


Logos, Sophia, and Lucifer tried this 2000 years ago, incarnated as Jesus, Magdalena, and Judas but failed. And as long as the two brother do not find peace there is not much hope in the end.


By Ishtahar Feb 6 2008 -

Very interesting Araqu'el. Az and I have also identified Jesus Mary and Judas as participants (? players, characters not sure of the right word) in the Great Cycle.

But that was only one of many times it was played out and it was not the last


By Ouza Apr 8 2009 -

I was just perusing through when I saw your intro there!

Yes, I remember the morning star but not so clearly or directly now. But was sent here as a so called fixer upper or for the purpose of building a new army for the then in charge YHWH because of the many results... of that war! It was neither good nor evil just the search for power and knowledge and the will to use it for what we may think as selfish or what they like to term on this planet Evil!

I know what you're going through and please please please never ever lose sight or hope to the future! Both Aza and Ish's site is a safe harbor of what you might call the Fallen and so called misfits but we do practice what we preach and that is unconditional love!

But little does the outside world know that they... are the one's who have been bamboozled by the so called unrighteous/righteous one's. Not Buddha, not Emmanuel, nor Mohammad or those inbetweens just those souls that profess to be in the know and of sorts declaring the way and who are really just fleecing the flock for personal gain and fortune!

And besides what's a few souls here or there, so to speak! They are gatherers but of the wrong kind or at least not what, I intended it to be!

Sorry I'm always a day late and a dollar short!

Welcome Home Love,

Ouza

p.s. I do remember that they were the existing YHWH at the time the number of 5 and that they were professing love as a factor but were in fact just collecting souls to their own selfish benefits kind of wanting and keeping the keys to heaven all for themselves while others would just serve their needs! Again welcome back home!