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Ashtart

Ashtart

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PostSubject: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyThu Dec 02, 2010 8:48 am

I'm not sure if everyone experiences this, but you know how sometimes you can have a long emotional discussion with someone, maybe lots of crying and pain and tears involved, and you're trying to calm them or to talk through something with them or give them a shoulder to cry on or a hug and tell them that everything will be okay? Well, when I have experiences like that, I always feel just... emotionally wiped after. Feeling like that right now.

Anyway. I think Dani'el contacted me in the astral. Here's what happened:

I got home from school, sitting in my room, thinking about doing homework, but I can't focus. I keep feeling... depressed. But it's not really depression... it's like a sadness that's because I'm not listening to something or trying to block something. The pressure kind of builds up. So, eventually I thought "Oh, maybe I should release the pressure."

I did that and I started to feel like someone was contacting me. And then I felt "off," like some other part of me was coming through. This was scary and I fought it for a while, but the voice/contact kept saying "believe in yourself," I guess as in to say that whatever was coming through wasn't going to destroy me or anything. So it continued to be scary, and I rode the wave.

I grasped at straws for a while, not sure what was going on. Then I started feeling energy pour through me, like someone was working a magick through me somehow, and my mind start to shift. I felt as if my human self was disappearing and surrendering to the Sidhe self. This time I was ready. That wasn't what happened though. I started to feel this pain at my back (like wings, which yes, I have always felt off and on since the beginning of my awakening...) and then i felt the urge to listen to some sort of emotionally jarring song... like that would somehow complete this transition (which was feeling very foreign and painful at the time). I'd had a couple of songs in my head since yesterday. One is this song by the band AFI called "The Leaving Song Part 2." It was so stuck in my head (and I never listen to this band) that I had it on repeat for maybe half an hour. So I listened to that.

Then I listen to "Passion" by Utada Hikaru, then "The Leaving Song" again, then 3 other AFI songs. As I listened to all the songs, it felt like some sort of trance was falling over me. And by the time I was done, I was seeing symbolism and visions where there was perhaps not supposed to be any. I watched the video for AFI's "Beautiful Thieves" for example, and at one point in the song there's a man on a couch with two women on either side of him, and the man has piercing blue eyes. I thought "Micha'el!".. and then the video progresses and instead of rich socialites in a mansion, I'm seeing the upper echelon of Shadow society... like, if there were elitist rich socialite Shadow, that's who I was seeing... and then at the end of the video, the main characters kill everyone in the mansion (! "OMG they're plotting revenge on them!" is what I saw) and then leave through a set of double doors with angels engraved on them (! "OMG they broke into heaven and massacred the lot!" is what I saw). So... I'm having visions about someone's violent intentions against well... those that are guilty, but not deserving of that... and then, the video ends, and I'm seeing a tall Shadow from the back, white wings far outstretched, his blond head bent, and him shaking in fury (yes, I could tell from behind). It was Dani'el. I think.

I walked up behind him, and gave him a hug. I'm trying to recall our conversation now, but it's hard to recall... he was being consumed with fury... he blamed himself... he thought he had abandoned his loved ones... he didn't think he deserved to see anyone he loved again... he wanted to take it out on those that had made him suffer.

I told him "You are loved. Don't blame yourself. It's not your fault." He was convinced that it was his fault. I told him "Don't give up, don't give in, they want to see you again." He said "Even Az?" I said, "Az loves you, he's waiting for you, he's looking for you." He didn't say anything. I kept repeating everything I had said, especially "You are loved." The anger, pain, and horror of the past were intense. Extremely difficult to feel... I explained that we are all working through the past, moving forward, moving past blame and "should have's." He turned around and he looked different. Calmer. As he looked at me finally, recognition seemed to dawn in his eyes, like he hadn't recognized me before. He seemed surprised that it was me talking to him. He said, "Ah," (like "Ah, I remember you now"), "I missed you." I kissed him on the brow and said "You are blessed. You are loved. You must join us. We are waiting to see you." He asked how to find us, and I did my best to just project "look for 'Shadow' 'Fallen' on the internet" over and over again. About the tenth time I did that, he disappeared suddenly in a flutter of light. I woke up out of that trance feeling normal again and was exhausted. So.
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Razi'el
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Razi'el

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyThu Dec 02, 2010 6:18 pm

wow, that's some powerful imagery, Dream...i tried to see if i could contact him just now myself, after reading that (what can i say, other than that i was inspired to try). whoever i reached, i told them the same thing you did. and he definitely seemed surprised by my appearance. i hope we see someone under that name pop up soon.
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Ashtart

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyThu Dec 02, 2010 9:50 pm

Me too!!!!!

=)

Dream'sEnd
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Azaz'el
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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyThu Dec 02, 2010 10:54 pm

It would be daft for me to just pop up and say Oh I wish he would too. But I do, the Gods only know how much I do.

Dan was ofteone to suffer from insecurities and to miss the things that were blatantly obvious and in front of his face. Although he would never admit to it. He kept a calm exterior most of the time but there were moments, when we were alone, that he would not be able to hold the force of his emotions in and he would finally release it and show how much he took on other peoples pain and suffering. What you say about his fits him so well Dreams, and it saddens me so much that he has possibly had doubts that no one would want to see him again. I just hope that you both, Dreams and Raz, managed to get through to him.

Some have speculated that maybe there is something blocking my contact with him, or simply that we are both so strongly linked that we are deliberately but subconsciously blocking each other and just not listening due to fear or pain or whatever. I'm also rooted enough in the real world to know that should he awaken and return, things may never be again as they were, we could live in different countries, our relationship could just be one of friendship in this life, etc etc. But, putting all of my hopes and fears aside, I wish with all of my heart that he returns to us soon, that he finds this forum and can return to his family. I think we could help him, and know he could help us.

Thanks for letting us know,

Az

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Ashtart

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyFri Dec 03, 2010 3:11 am

::nods::

A lot has been shifting recently, and I don't know the extent to which all of you are feeling it, but it's very definite and final and forward for me, here. I'm turning into something or someone else, whoever I ussed to be in relation to the Shadow, and while this is positive, it is also painful. I don't really know what my role was to you yet. When Dan came through to me, it seemed to accelerate this shift. I know he's out there, looking for you, perhaps reading this right now. I think we just need to hold firm in our hearts and believe that the time is now to move forward and to heal old hurts, and to regain all that we once had. For me, that is foreign and frightening but for you, for the Shadow, it is necessary. My goal has always been to find you all. I don't know how that will end up manifesting now that we are finding each other and reuniting, I only hope for peace and reunification in the highest outcome. ....

I'm still so exhausted from that meditation. if he comes, I'm going to be over in this corner for a while sleeping all that magick off =) Say hi for me and give cookies.

Dream'sEnd
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Scratch

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyFri Dec 03, 2010 4:03 am

Wow!! Here's hoping you, or Raz, got through where I couldn't, and he was able to pick up on the forum. I've got shivers all over right now, and am not quite sure what to do.

I got in touch with him just now, and he was all full of light. He looks like an angel now. I'm surprised it didn't occur to me earlier, but I was "seeing" him as a human before. Apparently, something wonderful has happened! I just feel really disoriented, or something, right now. I think all kinds of things have been happening and accelerating since Samhuin.
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Azaz'el
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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyFri Dec 03, 2010 10:47 pm

I think you're right, the events at Samhuinn have begun a change, although I have no idea in waht way or how, but there is a taste of something different in the air. If truth be known, I'm actually still recovering from when I sent out the call, it drained me far more than perhaps I should have allowed. And this period of ill health and tiredness has forced me to look at many things and perhaps in a different way. I began by doubting so much, questioning my faith, my spirituality, my path, even my past. But when push comes to shove, as the saying goes, this has been a painful yet positive event. And it's not over yet.

It's good to hear that Dan is more like his old self, at least on some level, and perhaps that awareness and blossoming will begin to filter down to the physical level, if he is incarnate, and allow him to hear the call and return.

Az

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Ousa

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptySat Dec 04, 2010 12:22 pm

~ Smile Smile Smile ~
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Dani'el

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyTue Aug 09, 2011 10:06 pm

That wasn't me. That was Micha'el.
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Azaz'el
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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyTue Aug 09, 2011 10:39 pm

You're saying that you feel it was Micha'el that contacted Ash? What makes you think that?

Az

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Ashtart

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyTue Aug 09, 2011 11:30 pm

You're right, it wasn't you.

In my opinion, you and Dani'el in my memories hold different energies. You may indeed be connected to us, but perhaps not as him.

Ash
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Dani'el

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyTue Aug 09, 2011 11:37 pm

Intuition. Among other things. Ash, may I ask do you remember his eye color? Were they dark blue or light blue?
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Ashtart

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyTue Aug 09, 2011 11:39 pm

No, you may not.

Look, you're not the only person with intuition. You need to respect the knowledge of other members here if you want to be respected, and so far we haven't seen that.


Ash
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Dani'el

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyTue Aug 09, 2011 11:50 pm

I have just tried too help. I understand that you do not believe that I am Dani'el whom you remember. I assure you that it was not my intention too sound disrespectful. I would really like too find a way too prove you who I am, but unfortunately for now I do not know how. And my energy has changed, I am sure in that. The lives I have lived here on Earth were quite different than the one I lived in the First Times and they have left a lot of traces and deep scars on my soul. I apologize once again if I sounded disrespectful.
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Ashtart

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyWed Aug 10, 2011 12:26 am

I understand that you're just trying to help, unfortunately your help so far has mostly consisted of telling us that what we feel and/or know in our hearts is inaccurate.

No one has the right to tell another person that what they feel is wrong. So. Thanks for your concern but it's unnecessary. We're fine without those kinds of help.

Ash
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Ishtahar
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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyWed Aug 10, 2011 12:46 am

Daniel

No one wants to deliberately hurt or bully you but I think there is something you very much need to know.

I think, perhaps, that what you are failing to appreciate is that there are those of us who have a very strong connection with Dani'el, so strong that even seeing his name is a kind of pain.

Whatever you say and whatever you do under that name is going to very deeply affect those who knew and loved, and still love him. I think maybe you are not aware how deep that goes for some of us and, although we are trying to hold back there is a lot of anger and pain under the surface that it is not fair to burden you with.

However, if you had taken your time to read the forum in more detail you would have seen the enormous outpouring of emotion regarding him and perhaps you would have been a little more respectful in your approach.

Can you imagine what it feels like for someone when their soul mate tells them they don't love them any more in such a public and casual way, especially when they still feel that love so strongly and are still very much connected to it. That is what we mean by disrespect.
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Dani'el

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyWed Aug 10, 2011 1:16 am

There is one thing I have forgotten to mention. English is not my mother tongue and I generally have a hard time expressing myself in words. I may presume that you will say that it doesn’t resonate with what you remember, but unfortunately it is true.

I am not empathic, nor I am psychic and there is little way for me to know how my energy feels like to you. I can only presume that it has changed drastically because from what I have read, my mind set and some of my character traits have changed from what you describe as my past self.

I honestly didn’t know that I have left such a deep trace in your hearts. It wasn’t my intention too hurt you by defiling your memories. Although my awakening has started more than a year ago, I still have a hard time with accepting that something like this can happen too anyone, and to mention to me who has never believed in the existence of angels.
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Ousa

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyThu Aug 11, 2011 6:54 pm

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ramiel

Is it just possible that our Danel is not the same spiritual/physical being as
you say that you are as (Dani'el)? [Perspective]

Also some believe that I am Az or even lucifer himself? There is entirely so much more here to learn from rather that having a contest of "I'm right.... no no.... I am right !!!"

I am totally aware as to where Dan is right now and his feelings towards Az but also aware that you as all of us need to learn and move on from this confrontation in order to be together spiritually as well as physically to this quest for the next level! We were all called here !!!

Ouza
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DylanC

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyWed Nov 30, 2011 6:02 pm

In my opinion and from what I have experienced, I believe that when someone has a past life memory it may not be their own past life they are connecting to, it must be remembered that we are all connected, death does not break these connections, energy can not be destroyed, it only changes, it has happened to me that during past life regression I would tap into a pocket of energy and be transported back to the time it is tied to. the "imprint" on this energy may peel off onto us and we may feel personally touched, it takes a lot of discretion and judgement to decide what you experience and see are your own and not someone else's.
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Ashtart

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PostSubject: Re: Dani'el..?..   Dani'el..?.. EmptyWed Dec 28, 2011 2:03 pm

Wise words and well spoken
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