ARCHIVE: The Beginning of Shadow

By Ishtahar Sep 9 2007 -

As someone who, at least at the beginning, was human, I have no answers to the question, where did the Shadow begin? When I knew them they were humanlike in form although far from it in nature.

The Shadow I knew spoke of a beginning within the Source which is where all life began so no surprises there.

When I knew them they were still attached to the Source, communing directly with the energy that is God, that enlivens everything and flows through all corners of the universe.

They were still able to easily and physically morph between beings wholly of energy, humanlike (although much bigger) and winged beings. They were able to speak through purely psychic means over any distance and they were able to pass easily through the physical and astral realms.

They had suffered enormous losses in the war they had fought with an ancient enemy that I know very little of.

So can anyone fill in the gaps?

Does anyone know, or care to tell, where the Shadow came from, who they were and, most importantly who were they fighting and why?


By Naamah-Ninmah-Chawat Nov 30 2007 -

The shadow of all was an energy that many say is female (Lilith/Tiamat/Kali) and the abyss itself. The male that the morning star is today said he was black so I am guessing he was some kind of dark matter but he had created himself. I have seen this black cloud energy in the woods once I could not beleive my eyes it was hovering over the water.

How the abyss was created I have no idea but it seems it have always existed as the beginning and end of all things including life. The female which was or became Lucifers counterpart (as the higher self of her daughters) and I suspect he or Tiamat created her for him to not be all alone, was red in energy and more like fire. However the black has bemome as a black flame which is the fire of Lucifer. All the fallen ones and angels are of fire and not clay like humans. This fits well with the scientifical knowledge that is available as well but what is not easy to understand is how they manage to take human bodies. I just know that the energy could easily burn the nervous system of a human that is not prepared at all.

I will tell you more about the enemy another time my dear Ishtahar.

Love
/Naamah


By Naamah-Ninmah-Chawat Nov 30 2007 -

I mean, it makes sense if they must use their childrens bodies. I have heard of stories not so pleasant when things have gone wrong with the fire. Be sure to "play" only with fellow kin and prepared humans if you for example need to speak to someone from our realm that doesn't have a physical body close to where you are.


By Azaz'el Nov 30 2007 -

Ah, something that not many people realise. Shadow energy is that of fire, and it can burn so much. It's one of the reasons why when we first started having human relations, things didn't go too well. When the Shadow release the animal inside it is made of fire and can and did often burn and destroy. It was one of the reasons for wanting to elevate Humanity - only a slight reason, but important enough to us.

It also answers why there are times now when, born in this cycle in a human body, it feels so uncomfortable. Our energy burns and makes us feel so restless and trapped.

Az


By Ishtahar Dec 1 2007 -

That is strange. Until it was said I didnt really know that Shadow energy was fire but as soon as it was said I have always known.

I think it is something that was so obvious it was never consciously thought of or remembered.

I wonder how many other things we are not remembering because they are so obvious we have always known them

Interesting


By Dreamsend Dec 1 2007 -

Wow! That makes so many things make so much sense. Azazel, what did you mean by the phrase: "Shadow release the animal inside it is made of fire and can and did often burn and destroy." That perked the interest, so to speak =).

I know in the Ko'ran it also says that God made the humans from dirt and the angels, or Djinn, from fire. I see a lot of parellels here, that's quite excellent.


By Azaz'el Dec 1 2007 -

I suppose to explain what I meant I have to be careful how I phrase it!!

When we allow ourselves to 'let go' be it during love making or magic, learning or healing, the energy that comes through us is almost like liquid fire. So think of whatever it is that you could be doing and become passionate about.... and then add fire energy.

It's often not too bad if it is something that we have control over or have constructed ourselves. But when you have taken a Human lover and release that fire into them.... it can burn spiritually, emotionally and physically. All Shadow, at certain times, could move beyond the physical shape of what we are and become beings of energy. Take that too far and you begin to lose control of what you are, forget who you are. So the 'animal' side, the destructive, creative, chaotic elements that make us can be released. So imagine having a lover who becomes a chaotic burning energy and is driving that energy into you............. it's not pleasant and took us a while to control and not to just let go.

Az


By Dreamsend Dec 1 2007 -

QUOTE
"When we allow ourselves to 'let go' be it during love making or magic, learning or healing, the energy that comes through us is almost like liquid fire. So think of whatever it is that you could be doing and become passionate about.... and then add fire energy."


Do you think/is it possible to exist in this state most of the time? Or, would that damage the body...

((I feel like my "higher self" is taking over, asking questions))


By Azaz'el Dec 2 2007 -

My honest answer is that i cannot remember. I know that I cannot do it now and feel intuitively that it would begin to deteriorate the bonds that keep the physical body together. Existing in this world there is the need for a physical element, so losing the body would allow the energy form to dissapate and so the essence or soul would be damaged and probably have to reincarnate once more.

However, this is just my 'feel' so perhaps other Fallen or Shadow with better memories could answer it better than I can. wink.gif


Az


By Dreamsend Dec 3 2007 -

I ask because there is a "destructive"-feeling energy that is more true than me that I feel urged to "let go" (how interesting that you use the same phrase =)). I hold back because there is the doubt of what would happen... whether I'd hurt myself, others, whatever.... but it hurts to keep it inside, too. In the end, it may be more harmful to keep it in than release it... this is the feeling that I have... though I recognize that either way that may have dire effects. I wonder if, if this is the urge I have, there are others feeling it too?


Will experiment,

Dreamsend



By Laviah Jun 1 2008 -

Dreamsend...U r my new best friend!!!
I feel EXACTLY the same way!!!! I can't explain it....but though now that I think of it, it could be just the Blood cravings Im having, (since I havent feed yet [growl] ) UGH!!! Its driving me nuts just to think about it!!!!! I even cry sometimes it is so strong. I even dream of it too!

Oh man, noyone (except vamps like me) knows how it feels when "we" have these cravings. I was once on one site and looking up on what CAN happen if the inner "beast" took over, and a guy had this friend that was going through awakening along with him. And he had this girlfriend he was involved with (but they brooke up), and she was with this guy at a bar where him and his buddy went to.(because he worked there) Anyways, His friend started to get REALLY mad about his Ex flirting and all. So he went all mad and just got lost to his beast within. He went after the guy and his ex-girlfrined. He started swearing and saying all kind of stuff! Like, "Im going to kill you!" & "Your F*ckin dead!"

So as he went after them in a fit of rage, his friend caught him and they had to take him to the hospital so he can get his wounds tended. I remembered that he tried to help his friend, but he wouldn't listen when he was calmed down a little. He tried all he could. But all that his friend was saying was, "Im going to kill that b*tch! And her F*ckin so-called man!" Thare really was nothing he could do for his friend since he didn't want help. So one night, his friend went over to her apartment where she lived with her new man, and somehow got inside. But his Ex new boyfriend hear him enter and got a bat. She called 911 And he got arrested.

I believe it was a couple of months when he got out of jail and visted his friend again. Though ofcoarse he offered to help him out again, but he denied it. He told him he was getting the hell out of there, and he did. Never to be heard about again...His friend dont even know if he killed himself or killed someyone else in a fit of anger. Who knows. All I know is that has really got me to strengthen the leash around my anger a little more. And to watch out for arguments that would result in fights.
I remember my last fight I had with this one broad. Man, when I heard she was talking smack about my family rather than me that time, I lost it. I went after her down the school hallways without a care in the world and with one thought in my mind. Her throat in my hands. mad.gif

When I did fight her, I felt a power and a strange need to see blood it consumed me~ It wasn't until a week later after the fight I came back and I heard how everyone was talking about it. My friends told me how I seemd I was not myself when I fought her. How My eyes were almost like blood shot. And how about 8 or 9 guys had to pull me off of her! They also said if they guys hadn't at the exact time she would have had a broken bone or worse! Jeez, I was just completly gone! And I NEVER want to do that anymore! The thought of not having any control on your actions...can you guys imagine? unsure.gif

But anyways, I guess that is pretty diffrent from what you feel like Dream. Sorry. laugh.gif tongue.gif


much love,
~Laviah~


By Ishtahar Jun 1 2008 -

No, I know exactly what you mean. I have never let my beast off its leash. Even when I am losing it completely I'm not, if you see what I mean.

I have memories of other lives and other times and I know what I am capable of. I have real issues in this life with letting go control. I am totally controlled at all times and if I ever start to feel that I am losing it I panic and grab it back.

I remember dark times and most of all I remember what it feels like in the instant when another's life is extinguished particuarly when you are feeding from the energy of it at the time.

I will never do anything like that ever again and I think that is why I have had the memories of it, so that the memories will stop me from ever losing control to that extent ever ever again.

So I guess my beast is tamed.........?
Ish


By Faddewr Jun 1 2008 -

I think all of us have a Beast inside of us, and it's not a product of being any sort of species of soul or physical form. But simply a paradigm that is subconsciously created through primal ideas that come with our higher thoughts, whether or not we're aware of them.

Like my beast, Ogre. He's formed from all of my desires and primal subroutines (eating, sleeping, sex, etc.). He's not nessecarily bad or evil, but he's more likely to ensure his own survival and satisfaction that those of others.

That isn't a bad thing, if you think about it. If people didn't have a beast, they wouldn't have that drive to nourish themselves, or sleep, or reproduce. Ogre's the little voice in my stomach saying:

"You're tired, go to bed"
"You're hungry, get something to eat."
"You're restless, go outside."

Ogre, for his reclusive behavior and agressive tendencies, is good. But that doesn't mean I give him free reign. Like Four Eyes, and the other mental paradigms in my 3-pound pile of neurons, I regulate between them and give them time to blow off steam when I feel they're restless.

Some people would call me and my numerous personas, typical schitzophrenia. And maybe they're right, but I'm intelligent enough to know that they are all me in one way or another, and that I'm in control.

I seem to have rambled a bit, sorry.


By Laviah Jun 1 2008 -

lol thats quite alright Faddewr,
As you can tell, I ramble too much also. biggrin.gif Yes, you are right, I do too believe everyone of us have that inner beast we must keep a leash on, and tightly too. Has anyone here ever thought about doing something that would result in so much caos it drove you nuts? And what would be the result for you? ohmy.gif

I dont know. I just think like that sometimes. And sometimes I think about jumping off a tall building so I can fly....dont ask, I just feel as if I can sometimes. laugh.gif cool.gif

with love,
~Laviah~


By Dreamsend Jun 2 2008 -

While that was not exactly what I was talking about Laviah =), I can identify with those recollections, too. I definitely have a "more pure" self that I contain tightly within myself for fear of.... something or other. The fear may not be justified, I hold on all the same.

And I agree that to a certain extent everyone has a "Beast", but in definition, that "Beast" that Laviah is talking about is a bit different. I don't know if everyone gets the overwhelming urge to consume the life force of others or go hunting with just themselves and no tools to aid them. My two cents.


-- A


By EaruArulay Jul 12 2008 -

Hiya guys, I'm a new member here and I feel already at home just reading this.
I have resided upon the Earth for a long time, perhaps from its beginnings.
The first thing I have noticed is the talk of the Fire and the mentions of it in the Qur'an, and other religions such as Zoroastrianism.
What first comes to mind for me is Prometheus stealing fire from the gods and bringing it to man wink.gif
I have come to know it as the creative fire, one of the four elements that stems from the source's energy.
The Air is the breath of the nameless.
The Water is the blood of the nameless.
The Earth is the body of the nameless.
The Fire is the heart of the nameless.
The above speaks for itself, and is open to interpretation tongue.gif
From my PoV I see the elements as the essential processes of creation, the Fire being one of the more dynamic elements (Multidimensionality).

My 'Beast' is a Dragon/Serpent whatever you may call it, and it exists within me as a guide, both carnal and spiritual.
It exists within me as an aspect of myself and has been with me for as long as I can recall. I have a soul partner, and her aspect/beast is a beautifully plumed Eagle/Quetzal-like bird.. the same aspect inside her exists within me and vice versa.
Yes I also get the feeling of that fire/beast overtaking you in certain situations, it feels good yet it's effect can be otherwise, depending on the circumstance.


By Ishtahar Jul 13 2008 -

I think that, sometimes at least, it depends whether it is done with knowledge and control...not not always control but ...what is the word I am looking for....awareness?....Consent?....active knowledge? anyway, if the beast melds with you rather than compeltely sweeps you away. Although that is not always the case because there have been times when I have been entirely swept away by it and the results have been good....or was that just happy accident.

I don't know. Sorry guys I am in a strange mood tonight and not at my most coherent

Ish


By Abaddon Feb 11 2009 -

The shadow if released from its shell will burn the human flesh to ash and reveal a form given by the force. When we where made we where given form to contain our essence so we could preform work as a physical being in existence threw memory these forms where tall for the males pure white hair eyes of varying colors some blue some green some gold some violet and some mixes of the colors. With out forum we have no control over our abilities and are shapeless beings with little concuss thought. The void that we came from the shadow that was the darkness with in the force called God, existed long before then came the light of creation the Light One named Lucifer. Then soon after God (as I shall call it to make this quicker to write). Used the essence of the Void the part of himself that was sentient and connected to him and he took from it and created the first creation the Fire given form from then on he made more each shaped like a man bred from the black fire. Lucifer was the counter to this the Light that sparked from God. With such more and more became and all where linked to God and did his will yet each was capable of interdependent thought and action each was guided by the whole and among them they made a leader the eldest of them the eldest of the Black fire that I now call hell fire. They followed him then Lucifer fell some time after the leader of these "angels" spoke up and questioned the reasons for the "sons of clay" and asked not only why we "the sons of fire" meddle in there lives what purpose they where made for but to question was to question existence and such lead to the angels being cast from the graces of the source to the darkened plane of black ash where there forms where burned away from with in forming a new body known as a demon to man the enraged leader begin killing the others who fell to earth and they where then reformed beside God. But many still fell and they too did change those among them that lived thousands of them among them the highest ranking the eldest did leave this plane and where reborn on the earth time and again yet those who remained these demons ran rampant across the plane called hell by man. Such is the story of the fall from the point of creation from the eternal void that always was because it was God, existing before creation before time before light and life. To exist is to know as the phrase goes "I think there for I am" to say one who cannot think exist can be true but with out thinking how could you know you existed with out a shell we are driven by the hands of fate to once again time and again coven to one another to be lead on to speak to share to awaken each other. Time and again we will always find each other such is the way of existence.


By Azaz'el Feb 11 2009 -

Thats one view of the creation of the universe and of Shadow, and regardless of how many are offered, we all have to find out own perspective. Each member, each telling, will offer a gem of insight and information. So,whilst I have a different set of memories to work with, your insights have been very valuable. Once again, thank you for adding to our information.

Az


By Fate Apr 15 2009 -

QUOTE (Azaz'el @ Dec 1 2007, 03:41 PM)
"When we allow ourselves to 'let go' be it during love making or magic, learning or healing, the energy that comes through us is almost like liquid fire. So think of whatever it is that you could be doing and become passionate about.... and then add fire energy.

It's often not too bad if it is something that we have control over or have constructed ourselves. But when you have taken a Human lover and release that fire into them.... it can burn spiritually, emotionally and physically. All Shadow, at certain times, could move beyond the physical shape of what we are and become beings of energy. Take that too far and you begin to lose control of what you are, forget who you are. So the 'animal' side, the destructive, creative, chaotic elements that make us can be released. So imagine having a lover who becomes a chaotic burning energy and is driving that energy into you............. it's not pleasant and took us a while to control and not to just let go.

Az"

I realize this an old thread, but this portion struck a chord with me, and I was glad to see it here for two reasons...
1. The mention of this energy being unleashed in proximity to humans-This is something I've always had trouble with, and never really been able to contain to a satisfying degree. Ugh, another pun. My friends and family have always complained about the amount of heat that I produce, even though I am nearly always freezing, even in 70+ degree weather.
2. I think I might be guilty of this as well. This one will require more thought, though I can say I have experienced probably higher levels of this 'animal', destructive energy than most humans carry around. I've learned to subdue it over time, but it's still a large part of my personality.


By Lael Apr 15 2009 -

QUOTE (Fate @ Apr 15 2009, 03:01 AM)
"Ugh, another pun. My friends and family have always complained about the amount of heat that I produce, even though I am nearly always freezing, even in 70+ degree weather."

Welcome to the club. I radiate ridiculous amounts of heat, but I'm always cold. I know exactly how that feels. ;-)


By Riley Apr 15 2009 -

QUOTE (Lael @ Apr 15 2009, 10:38 AM)
"QUOTE (Fate @ Apr 15 2009, 03:01 AM)
"Ugh, another pun. My friends and family have always complained about the amount of heat that I produce, even though I am nearly always freezing, even in 70+ degree weather."

Welcome to the club. I radiate ridiculous amounts of heat, but I'm always cold. I know exactly how that feels. ;-)"

I'm almost in the club. whenver my body feels like it, it will stay warm or hot even though it's freezing. And I can stand up to a lot of heat (even feel no pain from burning myself sometimes O.o).


By Ishtahar Apr 15 2009 -

Yes, I am like that too.... always cold but always radiating heat.... hmm... I have never really thought about it or realised it until I was reading this just now... hmmm.... I wonder why... and how to stop all that energy being lost.


By Fate Apr 15 2009 -

QUOTE (Riley @ Apr 15 2009, 08:44 AM)
"And I can stand up to a lot of heat (even feel no pain from burning myself sometimes O.o)."

I'm familiar with that trait. Over the years, in various accidents, I have managed to accumulate burn scars in several places on my body, but I always had the sense the actual burns caused others more pain to look at than I was experiencing by having them. When I started the job where I work now, I had to be fingerprinted. Eventually the poor woman gave up, and just used some of prints in places of others, because I only have viable prints on my thumbs, one pinky finger, and the middle finger on my left hand. All the others have been burned to the point they can't be used as evidence. To look at them, you wouldn't know it.


By Ouza May 9 2009 -

Being in the war and the military brings all that and more out but since I've retired it becomes more and more a hassle with the Central Air and Heat in the House! Either it's up or down, too hot or too cold! Actually it really plays havoc with the Local Electric Company in the Area and the control of my heating and cooling bills!

Ouza


By Eshtar Aug 28 2009 -

Fire I reasonate with all to well. Just like the Fire of Archangel Michael. I in my beleif am a protector in alot of ways. And I always feel like I am of fire. ya I know sounds weird yet after reading this probibly not..


By Azaz'el Aug 29 2009 -

Probably not indeed, depending on your heritage!! wink.gif

Shadow are beings of Fire, and so any of us reborn are still Fire, we can't escape what we are.... and our Kin are partially fire.

Az


By Eshtar Aug 29 2009 -

so very true. lol everything makes so much sence now.