ARCHIVE: My Story, Ok, time ot test openess X3

By Riley Aug 11 2008 -

Alright well.. I've been kinda prodding with my memories and such to see how you guys would react and if it was safe to share my info. I already know lots about my past, and I'll share it here, because i doubt i'll be judged here.


I originally was an angel of creation, still am. I remember the Temple of creation, where the essence of creation itself is endless. There was my first form, different looking than what you'd normally see an angel as. (I didn't really have "wings" to say. i wore a really big scarf that got high enough to cover my mouth, and the two arms stayed behind me. the scarf itself contained a soul, so it was a living entity. i had hair that covered both eyes and was white, and i wore a cloth around my head that covered my eyes as well that was under the hair. also have a long white kinda robe like clothes, and my skin was paper white as well.) I served under one god, supposedly A God of Creation himself. And no, he wasn't the god you all know of today (the christian one) tongue.gif I'm not sure what I did, though I remember being in the Chamber of Essence (an endless place of pillars that infinitely run up and down, each containing an infinite amount of creation). That was my first memory of being angelic, because the energy of both angel and creation was strong within it. I know the angelic energy was coming from me.
The Temple itself was endless, there is always new rooms being formed, so you can never stop exploring. there was a few few fave locations for me, like the front room from the front door, the fountain (which contained an energy, not sure what kind), and a large room with painting on the ceiling like you see in modern churches.

I was along with a few other angels (about 3), there wasn't very many of us anyway, the god kept to himself mainly, not concerning himself in others business.
Not sure why i fell from him, i guess i wanted to form my own path. I've always (including in this life) loved to make my own way with things, show that i can do it alone without the assistance of another's power.
I remember sailing the spaces, often around nebula's or stars, exploring everything. I think I was still intact with my god, i don't think i really became "fallen" at that point.
If you were to go look for me now while i was exploring, you would normally find me in a nebula. i stayed in them because the energies gave off a specific vibration, each with it's own unique vibe.

I eventually got a hold of someone that wold teach me something called Harmony, or using both light and darkness together without conflict. What i didn't know is the energy is corruptible, and it made me mad with the power it gave and it made me "Evil". I went around killing with the energy and power it gave. I eventually ended up to what you see in that ".Bound." poem. They (meaning the god and his angels) got a hold of me somehow and overpowered me, eventually (again) ending me up where you see the poem, which where they erased my memory of everything and cast me into incarnation.

Yet Alas, I am still filling in holes and figuring things out, so I'll update this once have new info.

New info: I was taught Harmony by a clan that i was forced into somehow. They controlled me with it and used me to kill people. But it that through that, that i combated the control. since they couldn't control me anymore, they erased my memories and forced me into incarnation.

New info: Ok, I now know my creator, he's actually incarnated. He says I was created by three beings instead of just one.


By Ishtahar Aug 11 2008 -

Of course you won't be judged. Who are we to judge you? We have all had our own experiences, our own 'fall' our own periods of madness.

Thank you for sharing that.

Have you found that with your memories returning you have begun to be able to work with the energies again?

Thank you again

Ish


By Riley Aug 11 2008 -

Which energies? The Harmony? If that, then yes, I've found out about it again, but I don't use it often, only for things where I need a boost to do things.


By Azaz'el Aug 11 2008 -

I don't think anyone on this forum would ever consider judging another who came here with sincerity, honesty and truth. And if they did, I would be the first to stand up and demand an explanation. This is a place of safety, as hopefully you have seen, a place where we can all explore our memories, our origins, and what has made us who we are today.

We have all had our periods of madness, Ish is very right here.......... I for one have had more than one episode, usually brought about by the corruption, devastation and death of things and people I have loved. And those periods of destruction have been filled with glee at causing pain and destruction to others, something I am not proud of, but have accepted as a part of my history.

The Chamber of Essence you describe is so very familiar to me. I don't know if we have experienced the same one or if there have been many, but I know such a place and found it not only haunting, but calming, peaceful and a place of pain. The pain has been through memories and the knowledge that I had to go forth into the Universe again and not stay in the place of peace and creation.

Az


By Riley Aug 26 2008 -

QUOTE (Azaz'el @ Aug 11 2008, 10:49 PM)
"The Chamber of Essence you describe is so very familiar to me. I don't know if we have experienced the same one or if there have been many, but I know such a place and found it not only haunting, but calming, peaceful and a place of pain. The pain has been through memories and the knowledge that I had to go forth into the Universe again and not stay in the place of peace and creation.

Az"

I know there was more than one temple of creation, i was just in one, so you may have been in a different one, who knows.

Info updated


By Azaz'el Aug 26 2008 -

Thanks for the additional information. I am curious about the clan you mentioned. As far as you can remember, were the people involved Human or another type of Kin?

Az


By Riley Aug 26 2008 -

QUOTE (Azaz'el @ Aug 26 2008, 09:40 AM)
"Thanks for the additional information. I am curious about the clan you mentioned. As far as you can remember, were the people involved Human or another type of Kin?

Az"

From what I know it was called the Omega clan. It was made of various kin and human; as long as the being had power, and was controlable, they would be allowed in the clan.


By Dreamsend Sep 15 2008 -

It took me a month to think abotu this one, lol. There are a few things in the decription you gave of your self that were familiar to me. The attire and the info about the scarf you wore, how it was a living entity was incredibly familiar. I at least have seen that before, though I don't remember when.

The feling of "sailing" through the spaces is familiar personally. As is the feeling of "power that corrupts" through its purity. I've never been bound, like that. It sounds truly intense.

-- Dream's End


By Riley Sep 15 2008 -

QUOTE (Dreamsend @ Sep 15 2008, 04:41 AM)
"It took me a month to think abotu this one, lol. There are a few things in the decription you gave of your self that were familiar to me. The attire and the info about the scarf you wore, how it was a living entity was incredibly familiar. I at least have seen that before, though I don't remember when.

The feling of "sailing" through the spaces is familiar personally. As is the feeling of "power that corrupts" through its purity. I've never been bound, like that. It sounds truly intense.

-- Dream's End"

Exploring the space and enjoying nebula's i miss so dearly.

Updated info


By Ellysium Sep 17 2008 -

Thank you for sharing smile.gif

I miss exploring the universe as well, the nebula's sound wonderful. I yearn to travel through my beloved universe, to be one with it yet again..


By Azaz'el Sep 18 2008 -

The experiences you all describe sound wonderful and it makes we wish I had experienced it too. However, I have strong memories of staring up at the stars and nebula from many different places and many different directions.

I unfortunately have not travelled through the universe other than stepping between the Gateways between worlds. But I have memories of knowing that other races cared for the workings of the Universe.

Az


By Raven Wight Dec 20 2008 -

Harmony is a powerful tool, and you got out on your own? strange, I still teach it even in this form, and can say that even when instilled by a mortal it is quite powerful. Having experienced it first hand, do you find it ironic at all that such purit exists in corruption? the golden sublime balance - well violet actually, being the combination of the infernal and sublime ie. fiery red and a soothing shade of blue - as they are currently understood - in any case I must say that I am impressed that you escaped, I have yet to have a student who was capable of independence without losing the balance and going mad with one extreme or the other.